Beep...beep...beep..beepbeepbeepbeepBEEPBEEP!

Finally went back for the follow-up to my blood tests today. Everything went great! Except for, you know, that part that didn't. That part went not great. One of my thyroid tests came back showing an under active thyroid, which technically should make me lethargic and my heart rate slower. My body said "FUCK THAT" and decided that despite what the results are saying my heart rate will remain fast and anxiety full force.
My thyroid is like America- lazy, under active and, strangely enough, really enjoys McDonalds.

Ultrasound of my thyroid.

 So, I never started the Ativan, because I'm a stubborn bitch and figured it's a temporary solution to a long-term problem and I don't like temporary solutions. I mistakenly thought, "Once my thyroids score straight A's she will see it's my brain causing all the mischief." I was wrong. Irrelevant to my anxiety or not, the thyroid issue is an issue of it self. She gave me a referral to a endocrinologist (fancy term for doctor that studies weird neck stuff) and for my heart, since I hadn't been taking the meds, she has me wearing a heart monitor for 24 hours. Is it anxiety or is my heart rate normally this fast? That's basically what she's trying to get out of that. She'll call me when she gets the results to decide whether or not she will prescribe long-term medication. After the heart monitoring, I will have to start taking my medication. 

The fun thing about the heart monitor is I feel like a cyborg. I have wires everywhere and a little handheld thing to record all my heart beats. The downside, besides the fact that the handheld device does not have Pacman (trust me, I asked), is that I have to record everything I do. So, basically what people have been doing with Facebook since it's existence.

"3:34pm - Took shit - No Symptoms"
"3:36pm - Admired shit - Symptoms: Pride"
"3:45pm - Napped - Symptoms: Dreamt of prideful poop"

"4:00pm - Sobbed hysterically into pillow about poop being highlight of day - Symptoms: Shame"

And so on and so forth...

Still better than a Wii.